Honest Hypnosis

Master Your Mind... for a Change

Dating and Relating

The Provider Paradox – Nice Guy or Bad Boy?

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Hey Guys,

One of my endless quests  here at Honest Hypnosis is to understand what is REALLY going on between the ears of modern men and women. Look around. Most men AND women seem to be confused, frustrated and miserable.

LONELINESS IS RAMPANT PEOPLE!

Marriages don’t last. Relationships start out with lots of love and devolve into quiet desperation. I see so many guys who are in a lot of pain because they can’t seem to attract the kinds of women they actually want. And I see a lot of women who can’t seem to find ANY men.  All they see are whiny, desperate, porn addicted BOYS.

This short video presents a compelling argument against the extremes of masculine “roles” or archetypes. On the one hand are guys who have bought into the idea that they must sacrifice themselves to PROVIDE for the woman… and the classic “alpha, bad boy, jerk” who basically wants to spread his genes EVERYWHERE. These bad boys couldn’t care less about a woman as anything other than a convenient receptacle for their sperm…

What do YOU think?

As a man, when I “fancy” a woman. I DO want to take care of her and provide for her. I want to be her hero. AND I want to practice making babies ALLL the fucking time. But after years of “practicing” and “failure” a few things have become clear.

A true alpha male is able to bring both of these energies to the “romantic table.” He is powerful AND compassionate. He is a LEADER who is passionate about his LIFE. And high quality women want to be a part of his life… But he qualifies THEM.

A few keys to flipping the frame are simple (but not easy).

  1. Stop trying to buy a woman’s attraction. Stop “giving to get.”
  2. Stop being mad at women for accepting your resources but not giving you the sex you think she should give you back. It’s part of their genetic code for SURVIVAL.
  3. Be generous but not stupid.
  4. Stop with “one-itis.” Stop with putting women up on pedestal. Stop giving your power away to women. Be AWARE that there are many, many women who will respond to either Provider or Bad Boy archetypes. Being a wimp doesn’t work. And being an arrogant shithead is a surefire recipe for misery as well.
  5. BEGIN to practice being AUTHENTICALLY in charge of your own life…

As a man who adores women. I’ve struggled with this dichotomy for a long time. My mother “hypnotized” me into attempting to becoming “the good man.” She was an ardent feminist who convinced me that wanting to have sex with women without being in a monogamous relationship first was “bad.”

“Don’t look at women like their pieces of meat!” she would exhort…

So of course the more she told me not to… the more I wanted to… but that served to convince me that somehow I was a bad man for wanting to look at women’s bodies.

Huh? Yeah. Can you relate?

Sex was supposed to be the ultimate expression of love. Sex without love was misogynistic and evidence of the oppressive male dominant “Patriarchy” that was the cause of everything bad that ever happened to women (according to my mother and other feminists at the time).

Women say they want this wonderful guy who treats them like a princess. Who is sensitive to their needs. Who is there for them. Who shows up. Who they can count on.  Who they feel safe with. Who isn’t only interested in them for the sex etc.

But their unconscious minds discount this guy as a “sucker.” A woman’s unconscious genetic programming is looking for good genetics, protection, and provision. THIS is the female survival strategy.

And it worked like a charm for the first couple of million years.

The strongest men, the best hunters, the leaders, the bravest warriors, the survivors stimulated a female’s desire to mate… and those guys got the most desire-able women. Those women got the most desire-able men. It was a win/win.

BUT. Those guys didn’t always live a long time. They were risk takers. They were often in harm’s way.

So to SURVIVE and help her children to SURVIVE, she HAD to have a “back up plan” which usually works out to couple of “nice guy wanna be’s” (beta males) waiting in the wings for when the chief got bumped off…

Being physically weaker than warrior males, women had to use indirect forms of power to get what they needed to protect themselves and their children. They had to be flexible. They had to be able to switch sides at a moment’s notice. They had to be able to keep men interested and “on the hook” often without giving up their edge which was the possibility of mating…

For the survival of the species.

But now? WTF?

Things are confusing to most good men. Ethical, caring, compassionate men. Men who are fully in support of a woman’s equality and right to choose. Men who applaud women as they accomplish more and more in the formerly male arena of achievement.

And THOSE high achieving warrior women? Who are THEY attracted to? Are they attracted to this wonderful nice guy who is so encouraging and supportive?

Sorry guys.

Amazing women are attracted to MEN not BOYS.

Amazing women are attracted to men who are even more badass than THEY are.

So guys. If you want high quality, high status, hot, smart, amazing women, be prepared to change your approach to the entire field of dating, romance, and love.

And that starts with your MIND. It starts with questioning what you were taught by your parents, teachers, church, etc.

Great love is still possible.

In fact deep, satisfying, intimate, fun, sexy, romantic, heathy relating IS possible. But being a “nice guy” isn’t going to get it for you. And being an “Asshole Jerk” is just a false act of puffed up machismo bravado that may get you laid but not loved.

The key is to “Pledge allegiance to your self for the sake of your own health.” (from my song “Freedom” from my “Key To Your Cage” album)

Focus on what YOU want out of YOUR life. Seek out and pursue YOUR PURPOSE. And your purpose is not to provide everything for a women’s ease and benefit just because she happens to be pretty.

Your purpose is ultimately the thing you will not give up for ANYONE.

Not a woman, not your parents. No one and nothing. A woman can beautifully compliment your purpose. But if YOU don’t have a purpose for your life, someone else will attempt to hijack it for THEIR purposes.

My purpose is to create a life where I can make the kind of music I want to make, the way I want to make it, WHEN I want to make it. Everything I do for over 40 years now has been to serve that purpose. All the hypnosis stuff. All the research into human behavior, health, healing etc. everything has always been me attempting to clear the crap that stood in the way of this purpose. One day I realized that my patterns with women and relationships were part of the problem. My mother didn’t support me being a musician and everything I internalized from her said, “give up your dream. Provide for your family. Sacrifice for the feminine imperative.”

A man MUST challenge this shit. A Man MUST seek out his purpose FIRST.

YOUR PURPOSE is something that energizes and attracts you MORE than any woman ever could. Your PURPOSE is something bigger than you. Something endlessly fascinating and emotionally compelling. It’s something that your woman has to accept about you. Something that she knows comes FIRST. BEFORE HER.

If a woman tries to get you to put aside your purpose and take on hers instead, you have just lost her. It was a test.

If you tell her “no!” (and mean it) you have just made yourself even more attractive to her. Does that make any kind of sense?

What the best women truly want is a man who is complete, empowered, self directed, strong, healthy, and NOT CONTROLLABLE by a woman.

And women subconsciously test this all the time. YOUR job as a man is to work on YOURSELF, FOR YOURSELF. Enjoy women. Appreciate them. Delight in their company. But stop chasing them. Stop giving them everything. Stop “selling” them on what a good guy you are. Stop supplicating. Stop begging. AND stop bullying and berating.

Instead BECOME the kind of man YOU dream about becoming. You will discover that the authentic man you truly are is the man they DREAM about.

This is not an “instant fix.” There is no “pickup line” that will magically deliver all the hottest women to you and keep them cumming back for more.

The progress and development of “senior male energy” as one of my former girlfriends called it, takes experience. Experience takes TIME.

And we are all running out of time. So it just might be time to get to work.

It’s time to get to work on YOU. Not on attempting to impress her, or women in general. You mastering YOU is the hottest thing you can do for HER.

It’s a bit of a paradox. But it’s an AMAZING win/win as this path with heart unfolds. YOU get to live a great life with lots of freedom and choices. SHE gets BOTH a provider AND a powerful man who is not chained to the “matrix”. She also gets a man that she clearly knows has lots of choices when it comes to women. This causes her to never take you for granted (which is good for both of you).

If you are open minded about mastering your mind for a change in this extremely vital area of your life, check out my “Better Man Blueprint.” It’s an ongoing program for self motivated men who want it all. At the moment it is not even available. other than through this link. It’s new. And I constantly add to it. It’s like having me in your corner of YOUR championship life.

A Better Man. A Better Life. Better Women. Less Strife.

Thoughts? Questions? Examples? I want to hear from you. Contact me.

I WILL answer.

– Mark

The Better Man Blueprint Invitation

How do you get over a broken heart?

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“Dear Mark, How DO you get over a broken heart?”  – Elizabeth J.

Wow! My email inbox is full as a Boa Constrictor after dinner, a bucket in a rainstorm, a chipmonk’s cheek, lately with questions about broken hearts, broken relationships and broken expectations in the romance department.

I know we live in times that reflect a lot less stability in our relationships than 100 years ago, or 50 or 30 years ago (or 20?). Chances are if you are human alive today, you have had your heart broken or will have your heart broken at some point. Either someone you fancy won’t fancy you back or a relationship that you are in will end and you might not have wanted it to end. So you may be nursing a recent wounded ticker or it may be old trauma that still triggers pain and suffering.

How you get over a broken heart is just not something that is a part of the typical High School or College syllabus. It’s not your fault that you don’t know how to get over a broken heart in a “heartbeat”. No one teaches us this. Until now.

Video:

In my new course , “How To get Over A Breakup” I give you everything you will ever need to totally and completely stop the pain, hurt, trauma and suffering of a broken heart, a broken relationship, rejection or whatever you are currently dealing with that is challenging you on the deepest levels…

What it’s NOT:

  • This program is NOT “therapy”. It’s a coaching course designed to give YOU the tools you need most to transform your current pain into power.
  • This program is NOT “easy”. It’s a lot EASIER than suffering. But it will require that you actually invest a little time for yourself to learn a few simple techniques that will quite literally use the same neurological pathways that you are using now to make yourself miserable, and flip them so that you can use them to feel awesome!.
  • This program is NOT watered down, vapid, woo-woo, fluff like most other self help books or online courses. The only thing that makes this different from my full 9 day NLP/Hypnosis/Timeline Certification program (which I teach in July), is that it’s the tip of the iceberg. Put THESE tools into practice and you will want to learn more.
  • This program is NOT some academic, theoretical, pie-in-the-sky, “rah-rah-rah” motivational pep talk. It’s actual tools and techniques that you can immediately try out in your own mind, and see if they work for you. If not, no big deal. But if they actually do what I know they do, if you actually apply the techniques in your own life you will get noticeable, repeatable results. And you will know pretty damn quick when you are out of pain and feeling fabulous.

For an extremely limited time I’m giving this course away for a fraction of what it’s worth. You might even be shocked at how low the price is.

Why? For several reasons:

  1. I want to help people. All my knowledge and experience doesn’t do anyone any good unless I share it, make it available, let you know about it. If I kept this to myself I would not be able to look at myself in the mirror. (And part of this program is about self love and self worth and mine is too high to be stingy)
  2. I want to make sure this program is simple enough for anyone to use and sophisticated enough for anyone who usesdsc03008-crop it to get the same positive results that I got and that 1000’s of my clients have gotten.
  3. I’m sharing this for so little because I need you to get into the course and give it a thorough test make sure all the links work etc.
  4. I want you to share your questions, your specific challenges, your stories of triumph and success so that I can make a solid case for even more people like YOU to get access to these powerful mind mastery tools.
  5. And finally I simply want to be sure that it is up to my usual extremely high standards before we roll this out in a much larger way.

So instead of paying my usual $500 plus an hour fees to work with me one on one, or $399 for a college level credit, you get the benefit of my 20 years of experience as a Certified Master Practitioner and Trainer of NLP , Hypnosis and Time Line Techniques. Plus my 40 years of getting clobbered “over the heart” by love over and over and over again… until I finally discovered these tools for transformation…

But in order to get the super duper, uber premium, “el cheapo” price you have to take some action NOW! This offer expires soon. And then the price goes UP! So take advantage of me NOW! :o)

Thanks for taking action. Your satisfaction is totally and completely guaranteed or your moolah back.

– Mark

p.s. Seriously it’s worth checking out just to see how shockingly low the price is. :o)

If you are ready and would like to go deeper with me… here’s how

How to Get Over A Break Up

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Or just leave a comment below 🙂

How To Get Over A Break Up

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Depression ReliefI get asked this a lot.

“Mark, how do I get over a break up?”

Well there are 3 (not so ) easy steps…. RIGHT…

We all want “easy” and believe me I LOVE easy. But I’m also sworn to honesty as “America’s Honest Hypnotist” and so I can definitely assure you that what I suggest is WAY easier than the angst and agony you are twisting in right now. AND WAY, WAY easier than just letting time heal your wounds. It’s also a hell of a lot easier than jumping back into ANOTHER dysfunctional relationship and repeating the cycle of misery.

BUT.

It will not necessarily be what you might think of as EASY. Because you will actually have to deal with some of YOUR stuff. And none of us want to do that. I didn’t want to when I was first learning all these leading edge NLP and Time Line and Hypnosis rapid transformation tools.

But literally just after I learned NLP my 2nd marriage imploded so  dramatically and painfully that I am convinced today that without the tools I would not have made it through that excruciatingly painful time.

And ultimately I began the journey of self mastery because I was freaking MISERABLE and most of my MISERY was caused by my being DESTROYED by breakups… And sometimes it’s a lot easier to be the one broken up with than it is to have the courage to say, “hey this isn’t really working and I don’t see that it will ever work so I’m breaking up with you for the sake of both of us.”

So both sides of the coin are excruciatingly painful.

For the most part the people who reach out to me for help with getting over a break up are the “break-ees”. We are talking about a person, (maybe you) who got broken up with and is deep in grieving, depression, longing, loneliness and a different kind of misery than the misery of being in a miserable relationship that no one wants to admit is miserable…

I find that usually the person doing the leaving has already decided this wasn’t working. He or she has gotten over the relationship enough to break it off and is ready to move on to something else.  Unfortunately You now know they are wanting to move on to someone better… than…. YOU…. OUCH!

So that leaves you feeling like your ex is dumping you and leaving you alone and now you have to pick up the pieces of your life. And it hurts and it feels unfair and you just want the good feelings back that you two had in the beginning when you fell in love.

Well nobody wants to hear that they were not “good enough” or “sexy enough” or “fun enough” or “loving enough” for another person to want to be with.

We call that REJECTION. And it plain stinking HURTS.

Breaking up the relationshipHurts. HURTS. HURTS. THROBBING. GRINDING. Feel like yer gonna die HURT. I know what you’re going through. Been there. Done that. Yuck.

We all want to be loved and valued and cherished. It’s a universal. But the bottom line is that two people coming together for a sexually intimate relationship is probably one of the most difficult things we EVER attempt. And it’s no surprise to anyone who’s studied this relationship field that a lot of them don’t work out. And a lot of the people we think of as “happily married” or in a “perfect relationship” are, as Comedian Louis C.K. points out in his most recent comedy show, “F*cking MISERABLE.”

M.I.S.E.R.A.B.L.E.

Some people break up and others just stay together even though they both have settled and they are both miserable. They just don’t want to admit it to themselves or each other.

And in every other relationship where both partners actually experience it as really, really good, it will necessarily start to trigger what I like to call “sh*t”.

Childhood”sh*t”, previous relationship “sh*t”, even past life “sh*t” comes up.

And the fact that it comes up is actually really good because in order to heal stuff, we have to feel stuff. And who better to heal it with than your adorable lover?

The problem is that no one teaches us how to heal the stuff that comes up in our intimate relationships. We don’t consciously date to find someone to help us heal our childhood traumas. We date to find someone who makes us feel good right? Finding the perfect person to “trigger the hell” out of us is UNCONSCIOUS.

So we get into these relationships and everything is all lovey dovey for awhile until we inadvertently touch each other’s old traumas or “old wounds” which causes us to defend and close down.

And in our closed down state we start to tell ourselves stories about how the other person is doing this to us. We tend to focus on all the other things that are unexpressed or not resolved between us… and finally we either give in and accept that the price of not being alone is to be in this very unsatisfying relationship… or we seek to find something or someone else who is “better”.

The sad fact is that we tend to recreate the same scenarios and dynamics no matter who we are with…

So in order to stop the pattern. We need to get over not only THIS break up. But ALL the past breakups and actually address what is really going on in all of our relationships that is ultimately frustrating and dysfunctional. (BTW I know my punctuation is all messed up in the last 3 sentences but I did that on purpose)…. (did it bother you? Sheesh! You’re just like my MOTHER! ;o)

We ALL want someone to justify to us that it isn’t us, it’s THEM. That’s why we talk to our friends about our relationship problems instead of to each other. We talk to other people instead of to the actual person who is triggering the f*ck out of us. Duh. That ought to work right?

But it IS us AND it IS them. And without someone else to trigger us we can’t do the deep and difficult work of healing ourselves. And it always takes two to tango as they say.

So all that said, right now you just want some help in getting OVER this person who broke your heart, dumped you, ditched you, rejected you, cheated on you, abandoned you, used you, abused you and dropped you, or otherwise “did you wrong”.

Ok. I’ve got 3 extremely helpful tools that work fabulously if you’re actually ready to let go of this person and the culturally endorsed dream that somehow she or he was the “One”.

They broke up with you so they probably aren’t the “One”.

Woman is getting over broken heartSo Step One is to stop believing in the “One”.

If you didn’t believe in the one you wouldn’t be bothered by this “one” not being it.

If you don’t believe in the “One” then whoever you happen to be with at the moment who you’re attracted to physically and who’s company you enjoy is perfect… for now. If it stops being enjoyable you can simply let go and move on to something better with someone else. Isn’t that the way it is with friends? We hang out for a while with someone and then something changes in either person’s life and a natural drifting apart process takes place. No biggie. Life goes on. We make new friends. No big deal.

What makes intimate relationships different is that we pour all this expectation and “story” into it that makes it like some gallderned fairytale… and we both buy into that story until it has too many holes in it to support it any more. And one of you had the good f*cking sense to call it.

So part of the problem that is causing you so much pain and suffering now is the belief that this person was the One. That he or she is NOT can only be reconciled by making them the bad guy and you the victim or you can change the belief. Without the belief it’s just not a big deal. You hung out for awhile. You had some good times. And sh*t changed. You both let go and moved on.

So I’ve gotten a lot of leverage on the pain thing by learning how to rapidly change beliefs. And if you’re open to it, I’ll be happy to teach you how to do it so you can just change any belief you want.

So easy to say right? Well, we just need to change the belief in the “One” to a belief that whatever is currently going on in your life, single, married, alone or with a partner is exactly what you most need right now in order to continue healing, growing and learning. It’s actually learning how to accept that whatever is actually happening is cool. And you actually can’t change the stuff that is actually happening. So learning how to accept what is ain’t just some jazzy new age idea, it’s something that actually works. And pretty fast too.

“Change your beliefs!” all the wise teachers say, but nobody tells you HOW. I’m gonna tell you how to change not just this one dumb belief that Walt Disney has drilled deep into our heads, but you will know how to change ANY belief about yourself. Get rid of old sh*tty beliefs. Install new POWERFUL beliefs. Presto change-o zing!

If you believe that you will never again find someone to have sex with that will cause you to feel bad. If you believe that there are dozens of hotties literally just waiting to meet you and give you the best sex of your life, you will feel very different.

Does that make sense? So Step one is to take charge of your beliefs about this relationship ending and to “filter for a different future” than the one you’ve been trained to imagine so far. If you have any questions at this point let me know ok? I promise to personally answer your questions. Contact

goab6-med-size-1000xStep Two is to stop looking for outside validation in order to feel loved.

“Love yourself,” all the wise teachers say, but nobody tells you how to do that. I’m gonna teach you how in a minute. Hang in here with me. Ok?

There are two levels to this. Level one is dealing with physical love. Getting the good feelings we want physically. Level Two is getting the good feelings we want emotionally.

First we will deal with physical intimate love. And I will teach you how to get yourself off so well that you will never need anyone else to do it for you. You will become a master of making love to yourself. And you will learn to cultivate your own sexual energy for health, vitality and endurance. Just this piece of the course should cost $495 bucks. Because it’s really, really, fun, funny, and will forever change your life for the better.

We will deal with learning to love yourself emotionally. To fill your entire being with self acceptance and support. You will learn how to literally adore yourself. Honestly. Freely. To love yourself so much that you would never, ever allow another person to ruin your day. You will love yourself so much that you would always give yourself encouragement to go for your dreams. You will love yourself enough to realize that attempting to get love from another human being is pointless and crazy until you love yourself so much that you actually don’t care if your lover stays your lover or just becomes a friend.

You will feel so complete in and of yourself that you will not need someone else to “complete you.” And the good news for THEM is that you become a lot more freaking fun to be around. And so they stop wanting to break up and get the f*ck away from you.

In addition, Loving yourself is the only way for you to actually get the love you want from other people. Neediness repels. You are currently feeling pain because you thought you were getting your needs met by your lover and now they are gone. But if we are honest with ourselves we have to admit, you weren’t getting the love you wanted and they weren’t either. You were attempting to get it from each other. It seems like it works that way but it doesn’t.

So you are all stressed out about losing something that you never actually had. When you felt all loved by him or her, you were actually just creating those feelings inside yourself in response to your perception of the other person and what you imagined they were thinking. THAT’S what triggered all the mood enhancing bio chemistry in your body. YOUR thoughts. YOUR perceptions. YOUR beliefs.

You are the one who causes you to feel whatever you are feeling.

BUT IT’S NOT YOUR FAULT!

Seriously it’s not your fault. You ARE creating your emotions and your current pain. BUT it’s not your fault because nobody ever taught you how to run your own mind. And that’s the 2nd way I’m going to help you to get over a breakup. You are going to be your own little Jedi Mind Master when it comes to love. You are going to be complete and whole and in your power to the extent that you will never again feel like a needy, lonely child in the middle of a war zone.

Step Three is learning how to “re-program” your internal “process” of being in love with said “Ex” so that you’re no longer craving it like a kid who’s had his or her candy bar taken away.

You might be shocked at how easy it’s going to be to simply “delete” them from your neurology so that you totally fahget abowt ’em.

Or if you’d rather, you can totally change their status internally to be that of a good friend who you care about but are no longer in love with. This is the most fun part. I love teaching people how to program their futures to be filled with all the good stuff they really want. I love teaching people how to run their own minds so that they stop beating themselves up inside and start going for what they truly desire in their lives. You’re gonna love this part.

At this point I think I should probably tell you my story enough so you can see that everything I’m going to teach you is stuff I had to learn the hard way.

I’ve totally been where you are now and I did it over and over again until I finally realized that I was the one setting up these patterns and repeating them. I could console myself by saying “well at least you wrote some great songs out of all your failed relationships and break ups”, and that helps a little. What helps even more is the fact that as much as I deeply adore and love my current girlfriend, if it wasn’t for my 2 failed marriages and some gazillion other failed relationships I would not be in any position to be with her for the long term. And if I hadn’t mastered the art of getting over past relationships I never would have gotten to be in a great one with her.

And I also have to say that if this one ever ends, I will be very, very sad. I adore her and I’ve never enjoyed the company of another person as much as I do hers. If it ever doesn’t work out, I will lovingly release her and get on with my life, open to whatever new possibilities are awaiting me. And knowing that neither one of us is desperate to be with each other and that we both enjoy our own company, keeps us “holding on loosely” so that neither one of us wants to be with anyone else. Now. If it changes we will definitely talk about it. We are committed to that.

And every time we trigger each other, we have so far been able to get up the courage to openly talk about it and address the issues and resolve the misunderstandings between us without making each other the “bad” guy…

Ok. are you ready? Here’s my credentials in addition to the boring stuff like, “Certified Master Practitioner and Trainer of NLP, Hypnosis and Time Line Therapy Techniques(tm) since 2003, private practice for 13 years etc…

  1. Fell in love With Monica in kindergarten. She moved away (The b*tch! ;o)
  2. Fell in love with the school nurse in 4th grade. She told me I was too young for her. (Sheesh! total rejection)
  3. Fell in love with Judy in 5th grade. Got my sister to ask her if she liked me. She did NOT. OUCH.
  4. Fell in love with this really tall girl in 6th grade AND this really short girl who had just moved to my town from France. They were not interested in me.
  5. In seventh grade I was in love with my sister’s friend and she held my hand once and then moved on to a much older guy who she later married.
  6. In eighth grade I had deep longings for this girl Clara who kissed me after the school musical did it’s final show to a sold out crowd of adoring parents.
  7. In 9th grade the minister’s daughter. YES the MINISTER’S daughter literally put the MOVES on me and converted me to the religion of what boy parts and girl parts are designed to be done with… I broke up with her in Bible camp because I felt guilty and sinful. And within minutes she replaced me with a kid who I thought was a loser. But he was the winner. I was the loser. (so sometimes doing the breaking up is worse because I longed for her for YEARS after that).
  8. There’s a lot, lot more but I won’t waste your precious attention on this other than my 2 marriages, one lasted 13 years and the other lasted exactly 365 days. The 2nd marriage breakup was the one that almost killed me. She was beautiful. Bright. Fun. And CRAZY as hell (with good reason). And I did not know how to communicate to her or lead as women yearn for men to lead. and the techniques that kept me alive and that I would love to share with YOU were developed out of THAT relationship. AND the good news is they kept me ALIVE and there were a lot of amazing women who I dated AFTER her. And I even got to experience a period of time where I was openly and honestly dating 4 women at the same time. And of those 4 women, I ended up breaking up with 3 of them in order to be focused on my current girlfriend and I am still very, very good friends with each of them. And that to me is the biggest credential I have to offer you so that you can feel confident knowing that what I might offer you is tested, proven and immediately applicable to YOUR life.

Ok? is that enough? or do you want more? I think it’s enough but if you want to hear more of my disastrous love life over the course of 30 years feel free to hit me up with an email. Contact me here

Now do you want to know the 3 techniques to forever eradicate your ex from your mind?

Or do you want to learn how to just gently remove them from the list of longed for lovers and slam them deep into the friend zone where they suddenly realize they made a big mistake? And then have the satisfaction of watching them crawl back to you on their knees begging for forgiveness and for you to take them back? While you gently reach down to kiss the top of their head and gently say. “I’m so sorry honey, no  harm, no foul, but I’ve moved on.”

Also you’ve been reading and supporting my work for a while and I really appreciate that. And you took your precious attention away from all the other stuff that you normally think about to spend it with me. We are connecting you and I energetically. Through the symbols of these words. I am having pleasurable electrical stimulations in my mind that communicates instantly to my fingers typing on this keyboard which I am pasting up here on the internet thing called a blog… you have been reading this and have vicariously entered my world.

dsc02956-close-cropAnd because I know you…. I know you are like me. Because this problem of getting over a love relationship is such a universal experience. I’m in a position to transfer some precious knowledge to you. Knowledge that can so powerfully affect your life that from this point on you can literally create exactly what you want, where you want, with whomever you want.

This knowledge will help you get out of pain. This knowledge will help you to live a happier, healthier, more successful life.

Usually there is a price to pay for this knowledge. I’ve paid a steep price. I offer it to you for far, far, less. And it motivates the hell out of me to know I can help more people to avoid the pain and suffering I used to know so well.

Some kinds of pain in life are not optional. This one IS optional. You can stop it. Tonight. You can keep it stopped. You can move on. You CAN deeply internalize the realization that you are fine on your own. You are fine with someone else, You are fine no matter what turn the course of your life takes. It’s all a learning experience and having tools to “get the lesson” and move on makes all the difference.

If you are ready and would like to go deeper with me… here’s how

Click this link to check out my “Kick the Break Up Blues and Get On With Your Life” course:  “How To Get Over A Break Up” NOW! 

How To Get Over Anxiety About A Boy or Girl

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I had a good question from a sweet high school girl today about dealing with anxiety around MOTOS (Members of the opposite sex).

Here’s her question:

Hi, Mark, my name is V. and I’ve been having problems with anxiety. My anxiety has followed me all the way from 6th grade until now 11th grade. It comes and goes but I’ve noticed a pattern and it only increases when I’m talking to a guy that likes me or someone I like. I wake up each morning and I feel the anxiety, when I sleep I feel the anxiety. For the past two days, I haven’t ate as much as I usually do and I’m starting to get worried. I’ve only had one boyfriend in the past and I experienced this same thing with him and I broke up with him due to my anxiety. What can I do to prevent this from happening?

Obviously I am going to suggest you check out my “How To CRUSH anxiety NOW!” program to get the full set of tools but I grabbed a few moments and made this short video to answer V’s question and possibly YOURS too.

For guys, I already have a course called, “How To Get Over A Girl” which goes pretty deep into this for the male brain. I’m in the process of creating a specific program for gals so you might want to get on my email list so I can keep you up to date on the progress of that.

I also welcome any and all questions you may have about anxiety related to dating, flirting, conversation etc with members of the Opposite Sex. aka MOTOS.

The really important thing is just to be fully aware that you can realize the change you’re looking for…

And here’s how

Click the link below to:

Or just leave a comment below 🙂

How To Talk To Strangers

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Wow! This video hit home.

I used to be soooo painfully shy that I had no idea how to actually make friends (much less influence them).

I read Dale Carnegie’s book, “How To Win Friends and Influence People” but it just didn’t “take”.

It wasn’t until I moved to what I considered to be the “unfriendly” city of New Haven CT that I started getting serious about breaking out of my shyness.

That’s when I started the “hi!” program. I would force myself to say hi to everyone I passed on the street, in the park, wherever I was walking about town.

And you know what? It was a blast! The first few “hellos” were a little scary but once I got warmed up it was INCREDIBLY energizing and uplifting and saying hi and smiling clearly had a positive effect on a lot of people. Sure, a few didn’t respond but that’s just part of the practice of not being attached to outcomes.

I even had conversations with people. Even women! It was eye opening. It was the opposite of creepy. It was refreshing and life affirming.

This morning I stumbled across this video that suggests a similar approach and I thought I’d share it with you just in case you need a little encouragement to get out of your comfort zone and begin to say “hi!”.

If you’re a guy and you find yourself frozen with anxiety at the thought of approaching an interesting and attractive woman, you might want to check out my “Shy Guy Help” program or consider some personal coaching.

I’ve been there and done that! You are not alone.

BTW my “Shy Guy Help” program is not about becoming a sleazy pick up artist. It’s simply about being comfortable showing up in the world as a confident man who is interested in everyone and able to enjoy and communicate authentically with people wherever you find yourself in life.

And…. yeah. Women find that attractive…

Actually EVERYONE finds that attractive.  So check it out!

The really important thing is just to be fully aware that you can realize the change you’re looking for…

And here’s how

Click the link below to:

– Mark

What Women Really Want

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38983255_sFired up by yesterday’s humor piece, Beware The Dog House, where guys who gave thoughtless, sexist, misogynistic gifts got sent to the purgatory of a concentration camp/prison called “the Dog House” I started thinking…

What is it that women really want?

Aside from the fact that the mainstream media seems bent on emasculating us men and manipulating us to put women up on pedestals so we buy them whatever shiny shit they say they want… there seems to be something else going on…

I get that men often forget to give gifts or often don’t put a lot of thought behind their gifts or give their woman something that the guy actually wants. And yeah, those guys are immature and clueless.

But legions of “nice” guys attempt to overcompensate by giving such incredible gifts that somehow will make her love them more and that usually back fires as well (for him, not for the restaurant, florist or jewelry businesses)…

I remember one weekend searching every store for a baking pan that didn’t have some kind of “non-stick coating” on it so I could bake a cake for my girlfriend at the time. She was a fanatic about toxic chemicals leaching into our food. So out of respect for her I wanted to make sure even her birthday cake was “in compliance” with her wishes.

How thoughtful of me?

Yes it was thoughtful but on another level, not really. I was afraid she would reject me and put me in the dog house if I didn’t do it “right.”

I was tip toeing around HER agenda.

And when she got home from the meditation retreat where she went to celebrate her birthday without me, she wasn’t particularly impressed with my valiant efforts to make her a great meal and welcome her home with full romantic fanfare.

WTF?

Women SAY they want a man to cater to their every whim and desire. And we “good guys,” “nice guys,” caring guys who fall for that are missing something MASSIVELY significant.

Women don’t want a man who tippy toes around them or their feelings. Women want a man to lead them. Yes they want a man who is not totally clueless about their preferences and desires, BUT. Ultimately women are repulsed by pleasers.

THEY want to PLEASE their MAN. They want to look up with admiration to their man.

Interesting note: When I was searching for a stock photo for this post, I typed in “women admiring a powerful man” to see what would come up. NOTHING. This is so beneath the radar of our culture that there are no pictures in t he thousands and thousands of stock photos that represent what I’m talking about. Interesting. Finally I found a pic where if you notice, HE is leading HER. She is looking at him with admiration. HE is looking back at her from his place of power.

This explains why so many women are hot for CEO’s, Doctors, Lawyers, Millionaires, Movie Stars. They are attracted to POWER. They are not attracted to WIMPY-NESS.

They want a man who is so into his own MASSIVE THROBBING vision for his life that if he does remember her birthday she is grateful simply for the acknowledgement and his appreciation of her.

A lot of women say they are waiting for their “prince.”

But ultimately women do not want a “prince” — they want a KING.

Think about it. A “Prince” is usually a spoiled, self absorbed, immature, privileged, coddled and narcissistic brat.

A “King” on the other hand has shit to do. He has more important things to do than a prince. He has a kingdom to run. He has enemies to deal with. He has responsibilities and demands upon his time, talent and treasure. He is a leader. He is powerful. He is feared.

What women really want is a man like that who in spite of all that he has to deal with, still remembers her birthday.

Why? Because she looks up to him and realizes that he is on a higher level than she is and yet she still matters to him.

Does that make any logical sense?

In other words if SHE is the King in your relationship with her, then you BETTER get her a great gift or you will be sent away from “court.”

Ultimately it is all about Who has the power. Women will try to take your power from you. But they don’t really want to succeed at that. They want YOU to be immune to their power plays and to prove that you are THEIR King.

It is called a “test”

So here are your action steps for the day…

  1. Fvck the dog house. BEWARE of the barrage of emasculating messages from the mainstream media. Turn off the TV. Turn off the Radio. Take even their ‘humor’ with a grain of salt. Pay attention to what your woman is really saying between the lines of her complaints. She wants to matter to her powerful, dominant man. She wants to be touched by his thoughtfulness BECAUSE he is more focused on his path and mission than on her. It seems like a paradox and perhaps it is. But it really isn’t the gift that matters. It is the THOUGHT that counts.
  2. So really the greatest gift you can give her is to focus on becoming master of YOUR world. Master of your life. MASTER of your relationships. Again, that doesn’t mean becoming a bossy, arrogant asshole, it’s about OWNING your own power and purpose for your life. It’s about getting your ass in gear and going for greatness.

No one teaches us men how to be the kinds of men we could be. Most of us have been raised by women, taught by women, trained to obey and supplicate to women. That has to stop.

It is time to step fully into your own personal mastery as a man. It’s time to become the KING in your own life, in your own world, in your relationships.

King? I meant EMPEROR!

Need help? Know when to get some coaching. Start educating yourself about this stuff.

Your world is about to get a lot bigger… Your Majesty.

If you have any thoughts or questions or subjects you would like me to reflect upon in future videos, click the button below and contact me today.

Let’s talk…