I just finished reading a great e-book by a guy named John Alexander called “How To Become An Alpha Male.”
The key point?
“Whoever cares least controls the relationship.”
If you are a shy guy you need this book. Just get it! It’s actually a pretty ancient concept. You could even call it a cliche’ — but that’s why stuff becomes cliche’ because it’s TRUE.
To overcome shyness is one step in becoming an alpha male in the best sense of the word
If you are a shy guy I guarantee that you care massively what other people think about you.
That’s it in a nutshell isn’t it?
You’re so concerned about what other people think and that they might think badly of your or critically that you freeze up.
Am I right? Believe me. I KNOW you because I WAS you.
Real life example: the most alpha guy I know is just a freaking blast to watch and to hang out with because he is totally comfortable in his own skin, doesn’t give a shit what other people think about him and is quick to laugh off any social faux pas that he may incur.
He can be loud and uncouth, he likes to be the center of attention and he’s smart and successful.
He is unashamed of his maleness.
The beautiful thing about this guy is that he really and truly doesn’t care if you think he’s a jerk.
Women, including his wife, adore him. Well most women. Some women think he’s a loud obnoxious jerk, but guess what? He couldn’t care less what they think of him! I’m going to hang out with him later this week and maybe I’ll be able to get him to consent to an interview….
Next Example is my oldest son’s good friend Byron.
Byron is absolutely the most uninhibited guy I’ve ever seen. He’s not afraid to act gay, he’s not afraid to dress in women’s clothing, he’s not afraid to fall down and slobber on himself for a laugh. He’s evidently totally in demand in whatever nightclub or bar he goes in to. Forget about having a Ferrari to attract chicks.
This guy is a chick magnet!
Again, his power comes from not caring what other people think.
A personal example: when I finally decided to stop being shy and to stop worrying so much about what people thought of me while performing my music. Booom. A huge shift.
At one point I quit performing my songs altogether and started painting. The painting was cool because I didn’t have to perform it. I didn’t have to be present for people to either like it or not like it. I honestly didn’t care. I paint what I paint to please no one but myself.
When I returned to the stage I took that attitude with me.
It works with women big time
It’s easy to forget even in a relationship.
I don’t know about you but I tend to be a little bit of a “pleaser” and I can fall back into it if I’m not conscious about it. This book kicked my ass a little bit and I had a blast this weekend playing with a renewed “Alpha Attitude” around my girlfriend.
I stopped trying to please her.
At one point she was fussing about something and wanted me to fix this mosquito netting we have in the back yard. She wanted it higher. It was fine the way it was. I told her she was being “fussy” and I flatly refused to make it higher. She got a bit huffy about that!
Internally I just said my new “Alpha Afformations” and I played with this new “Alpha Attitude”. I let go of being concerned about her mood and let her get huffy.
Long story short…we had mind blowing sex yesterday… I played her like a musical instrument. Not caring whether I was “doing it right” or not.
Being alpha is seductive as hell.
How to stop being shy around beautiful women
Your Assignment (should you choose to accept it and I don’t care if you do or not) is to pretend for a day (or for the rest of your life), that what other people think is actually none of your business.
It might help if you get all “Jolly Green Giant” on the people in your life and see them waaaaaay down below you like little ants running around.
In other words, shrink down the relative importance of other people, their opinions and even their doings.
Here’s your “Afformations” for the day :
- “Why am I an alpha male?”
- “Why do I stop giving a shit what other people think of me?”
- “Why do I choose to care what I think?”
- “How would I respond to this woman or situation if I was an alpha male in the best sense of that term?”
Got questions? I have answers and I want you to have them, so…