Problems are a part of life.
Get good at solving them.
Get a life. Get the girl.
Ok. So you have a problem. Since this is a site all about personal mastery for men, and because one of our great “problems” as men is to be able to remove the obstacles (as well as clothing) that separates us from the women we desire,
Let’s explore a little bit about what a “problem” is and what to do about it.
Chances are there is some thing you do or don’t do that if you did or didn’t do it your life would be better.
Am I right?
Chances are there is some other person or people who seem to be the cause of problems too.
We will get to “dealing with difficult people” at some point, but today, let’s first talk about what this thing called a “problem” is. So we can make some progress with all levels of “problem” in your life.
So what’s a “problem”?
A “Problem” is:
The obstacle to your well being and happiness that you are currently concerned with or working on.
For you it could be “How to strike up a natural conversation with a group of bikini clad models so that one or more of them want to go home with you and have great sex…”
For mathmaticians, getting a nice big juicy “problem” is NOT a problem. It’s what they live for as math geeks.
For a gardener, keeping the deer and the rabbits and the woodchucks and the spider mites and aphids and cucumber beetles etc from eating YOUR plants before you get a chance to eat them is a problem…
Gardeners may gripe and moan about that but it is the nature of the activity to have challenges to your success. Your purpose is to solve them and then maximize your yield. If you don’t like doing that. Stop gardening. Gardening also involves something called “work”. Lifting bags of soil. Digging holes, building raised beds, weeding, watering, even HARVESTING can be a drag…. unless you realize that it is part of a process that is thoroughly enjoyable.
For many guys the obstacle to their happiness and well being is their inability to attract and land the kind of woman that they THINK they want to fuck… or live with… or whatever it is they think they want…
Notice I said “think they want”. You want a hot 10 babe-licious woman because you think having her will make you happy. You imagine fucking her and it being great…
But most of the time you just sit there frozen with fear and she goes home with some total asshole because he wasn’t intimidated by her hotness…. And you? You end up jerking off to porn. So you “solve the problem” of your sexual desire the easiest way. Without risking anything or learning anything. That’s a bit like the wannabe gardener buying some little cactus at walmart and thinking he’s a master gardener.
But ultimately EVERY problem carries with it the OPPORTUNITY for greatness…
But when we get upset at our challenges or when things don’t go the way we THINK they SHOULD go. We create suffering.
Suffering sucks. Stop it! Start asking yourself THIS question: “What if THIS “problem” is PERFECT?” “What if this is my “JEDI” warrior’s challenge?”
I have a couple of guy friends that are in relationships. They got in to those relationships to solve the problem of their loneliness and desire for physical intimacy. Most likely their women got in to those relationships to solve similar problems… or to find a good father for their children. Whatever. They may have solved one problem but they created the next level of opportunity for growth.
You see, whatever we do, we are attempting to remove obstacles to our well being and happiness… which often works for a little while until the “solution” becomes the “problem”. Then we have to solve the new problem and when we do, quite often the pattern repeats. That is life.
This is all supposed to happen! Because if it didn’t we would be bored as fuck. The next step is to find a way to resolve the obstacle to happiness in as elegant and congruent a way as possible. To solve the equation in as deep and wide and ecological way as humanly possible…
For example: In my garden. I moved to this new place last June. I had already started greens, cucumbers and tomatoes in pots at my previous apartment. So I moved them to my new location and BAM! The damn rabbits and wood chucks hit me HARD. So to solve that problem, I could have started killing them, OR I could simply put the damn pots up on tables. Which I did. problem solved.
UNTIL the deer came through one night and hit a bunch more of them… The tables saved them the hassle of bending down… Solution? First I tried some deer spray shit… which didn’t work that well. Then I built a corral of chairs and empty bins around my garden… worked pretty we’ll… But not perfectly… so after some deep thought and imagining, this year I have built a deer fence.
Is the problem solved? It might. But certainly something else will arise to keep me interested.
I would like to add, that since my solution to the rabbits and woodchucks was putting stuff up on tables, now I do not have to bend over to weed or harvest my veggies. The solution to one “problem” solved another one… That’s ELEGANCE in the solution business…
The problem with “Problems” is that we solve them and then idiotically think they will STAY SOLVED.
Perhaps THAT is the real “problem”?
Quite often the problem is us. Why am I even bothering to garden when I can just get food at the grocery store?
Because IT MAKES ME HAPPY AND FILLS ME WITH WELL BEING… to walk out and pick my own fresh food. I LIKE getting a good work out doing actual work that benefits me in ways other than just exercise. Again. An elegant solution.
Ultimately that is what we are doing ALL THE FUCKING TIME! Attempting to keep ourselves happy and in a state of feeling good.
So this is where innovation comes in. Last year I got hit by animals on the ground and deer at waist height… one solution is to grow stuff on top of my trailer or behind my new deer fence.
This is the story of EVERYTHING. Look around at all the cool shit we have. Cars. Cell phones. Computers. The invention of cars caused a lot of problems.
The shitty dirt roads that were fine for horses and walking suddenly were a problem for going fast. And going fast was a problem to the soft mushy bodies we live in so we had to have safer roads and safer cars…
Then the damn things burned up too much gasoline so we had to have cars that were fuel efficient… and driving was so boring and safe that we needed rumble strips on the sides and in the middle so if we fell asleep at the wheel, we would get woken up by the rumble noise…
Do you see how this works?
Now let’s talk about you. Let’s talk about your “problem”.
Let’s say it’s approach anxiety. You see a pretty girl and you want to fuck her. But you can’t just see a pretty girl and AUTOMATICALLY have her walk over to you lift up her skirt and climb on to your hard dick…
Wouldn’t THAT be cool?
Not going to fucking happen. right?
If it would make you happy to be able to fuck her whenever you want, you are going to have to solve some pretty cool problems. The cool thing is every one of these problems that you must solve will make you a way better man, a better lover and more likely to be able to attract better and better women.
“Problem”: Somehow you have to go from noticing her hotness, her attractiveness to getting up off your ass and walking over to her and letting her know you exist. Because guaranteed, if she is as hot as you say, plenty of other guys have noticed her and many of them don’t have your problem of being shy. So you could focus on “getting over your shyness”. You can practice thinking and acting like a guy who has actual balls and confidence. That’s pretty cool. Or, perhaps there is an even more elegant solution? Like beginning to think and act like the kind of guy who WOMEN CHECK OUT AND COME OVER AND INTRODUCE THEMSELVES TO…
For example, I went on a few dates with this woman who was really into dogs. She told me that at a dog show she actually tripped and fell right at actor Kevin Bacon’s feet. He was duly impressed. “I’ve had women do a lot of things to try to meet me,” he said with a sly smile, “But THAT was really putting your all into it!”
They had a nice laugh about that, what we call a “Moment” and because he is a married man, nothing else came of it…
BUT WHAT IF?!
What if YOU walked around with that same kind of “Kevin Bacon” attitude, using ANYTHING that happens with women, ANY interaction to make challenging comments with a sly wink?
And a little side comment here: Notice that Kevin Bacon was at a dog obedience event. Even though he’s a famous actor, he actually leaves his house to go out in public and do shit he is interested in. Get it? He leaves his house and goes out into the world to do shit that is INTERESTING TO HIM.
Hint: Women find men who are out in the world pursuing their “path” to be attractive. Guys who live in their parents basement and play video games all the time are not. If you have no interests. Fucking get some.
Now back to the main THRUST of our little talk…
What if in your own mind YOU were a star? What if in your own mind you were a catch? You were to women what that hot 20 something babe is to men?
What if you were the guy who walks into a room and all the women NOTICE… What if YOU are the guy they fantasize about being with?
What would life be like then?
Who would be happy and fulfilled then?
“But wait!” you protest. “I’m NOT a movie star!”
OK, so the real problem is that you don’t think you are good enough to fuck hot women. So you therefore give away all your power to the pussy…
Perhaps my friend THAT is your “real” “problem”. You put pretty women up on pedestals and therefore lower your own value in relationship to theirs. That’s just another opportunity isn’t it?
What if I could teach you how to powerfully install a new program in your mind. Let’s call it the “Kevin Bacon” or “the [cool actor of your choice] program”.
I mean Kevin Bacon is a decent actor. But he’s not exactly considered the greatest actor of all time. Yet women throw themselves at him…
He is famous. But so what? There are a lot of guys who are not famous but who THINK like the kind of guy who is. Who walk like they are hot shit. Who challenge and tease women. Who put themselves higher on a pedestal than she is.
What if you installed deep in your unconscious mind this little notion: “Any woman would be fortunate to have the opportunity to be with me.” and all the variations of that. “Any woman would be fortunate to have the opportunity to talk to me…”
What if you walked around broadcasting that idea with your body language, your voice tonality, your attitude? What if you actually and totally BELIEVED it yourself? Really believe it. Deep in your Unconscious Mind. You are that guy. What would that be like?
The bottom line my friend is that when you solve this little “problem” you will have ample opportunity to solve many other delicious challenges like, “now that I’ve fucked her and she’s addicted to my cock, how do I get rid of her so I can continue to fuck other women too?” or even better: “Now that she’s addicted to my cock, how can I frame our relating so that I can ethically and honestly continue to fuck other women too?”
All of that to bring you to the point of the day which is:
What if solving this “problem” (and any other “problem” that may arise) is actually the reason you are here in this little space ship called a “body” in the first place?
What if the thrill of solving this problem was more interesting and fulfilling than any TV show, movie or video game? What if YOU ARE THE STAR of this movie called your life?
Personal mastery is about rising to the challenges and joyfully solving the “problems” that are the keys to you developing new and better levels of mastery.
Are you in?
Let’s get started.
Step one: Join Team Cowabungah below. It’s free and you can unsubscribe at any time.
Step two: Start watching your email “in-box” for immediately useable tools and techniques to re-wire your circuits so that you have full and free access to her “in-boxes”….
Step three: Apply the ideas you learn here. Adjust. Adapt. Experiment. Email me to tell my about your wins, successes, triumphs and challenges. Apply. Adjust. Adapt. Repeat. Level up. Repeat. Level up. Repeat…
Do it. Now!
Questions? Thoughts? Comments?
P.S. If you have any thoughts or questions or subjects you would like me to reflect upon in future videos, click the button below and contact me today.